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Rabbi Shalom Kamenetsky
Based on an address delivered at the Principals’ Think Tank in the summer of 2021.
Leadership presents many challenges, but perhaps the biggest is being able to guide a group of people who are each unique individuals. The nature of individuals is that none are exactly the same, and an approach or direction that moves the group forward may not be optimal for each member of that group. Let’s look to the תורה and חז”ל to develop an approach to Jewish leadership in light of this difficulty.
מנהיג שיהא סובל כל אחד ואחד לפי דעתו
In פרשת פינחס, משה רבינו turns to הקב”ה and asks Him to select a successor who would be the future leader of the Jewish people. משה said: (במדבר כז:טז) יפקד ה’ אלקי הרוחת לכל בשר איש על העדה. Let הקב”ה, let G-d of all the spirits, all spirits, all feelings, all opinions, appoint someone to lead כלל ישראל.
Rashi addresses the words אלקי הרוחת, G-d of all spirits: למה נאמר אמר לפניו רבונו של עולם גלוי לפניך דעתו של כל אחד ואחד ואינן דומין זה לזה מנה עליהם מנהיג שיהא סובל כל אחד ואחד לפי דעתו. Why is this expression (אלקי הרוחת) used? Moshe said to Hashem: “Master of the World! Each person’s personality is revealed to you, and no two are alike. Appoint a leader who will tolerate each person according to their individual personality.”
משה understood that an essential quality of a leader is to recognize that everyone is different and lead them with that awareness. The מדרשים on this פסוק (במדבר רבה, תנחומא) use the well-known phrase to describe משה’s request: כשם שאין פרצופותיהן דומין זה לזה כך אין דעתן שוין זה לזה. Just as their appearances are different, their opinions, feelings, and where they’re coming from arenot the same. מנה עליהם מנהיג שיהא סובל. Appoint a leader who will be a סבלן, patient and understanding. Give them a leader who can guide them, כל אחד ואחד לפי דעתו, to tolerate, to carry, each one’s opinions, to see things from the vantage point of every individual.
Leadership starts with the ability to see individuals. Obviously, leadership goes beyond that, but first, the leader needs to understand individuals. That’s so necessary.
They say in the name of the Kotzker that משה was making this point specifically after the zealotry of פינחס. Looking to the future, משה declared: No, no, no; a zealot cannot be a leader. He does not understand דעתו של כל אחד ואחד, the opinion or vantage point of every individual.
שיוכל להלך כנגד רוחו של כל אחד ואחד
Hashem responded to משה’s request by saying (במדבר כז:יח) that the next leader would be Yehoshua: קח לך את יהושע בן נון איש אשר רוח בו. Take Yehoshua bin Nun, a man in whom there is spirit. Again, we find that the leader is described with the term רוח.
Here, Rashi explains: כאשר שאלת שיוכל להלך כנגד רוחו של כל אחד ואחד. Yehoshua has the quality you asked for. He can “go against” the personality of each and every person.
This seems to be a different quality. Previously, Rashi explained that a leader must be someone who can understand each individual and tolerate their idiosyncrasies and opinions. Here, Rashi describes the leader as a man of spirit who can stand up against each individual. And yet Rashi prefaces his explanation here with כאשר שאלת. This is the kind of leader you asked for.
This suggests a deeper understanding of what it means to be a leader. To lead, one must have a strong sense of direction and mission. The leader needs to be able to stand up to those who would distract him or cause him to lose sight of what’s best for the nation. At the same time, he needs to understand the opinions, needs, and priorities of each member of his nation.
In fact, it’s the quality of שיוכל להלך כנגד רוחו של כל אחד ואחד that gives him the confidence to be a סבלן, the quality that משהsought. With his strength of purpose and clarity of vision, such a leader is open to hearing everyone’s opinion and perspective, bearing the burden of leading millions of individuals, כל אחד ואחד לפי דעתו.
קצר רוח והרחבת הדעת
There’s a fascinating אור החיים הקדוש on the פסוק in שמות (ו:ט) that says: ולא שמעו אל משה מקצר רוח ומעבדה קשה. They didn’t listen to משה because they had קצר רוח, literally shortness of breath. The אור החיים explains that קצר רוח here means that they were narrow-minded; their רוח, the ability to see possibilities and options, was constricted. They couldn’t conceive of the vision that משה presented to them. The אור החיים explains why: כי לצד שלא היו בני תורה לא שמעו, ולזה יקרא קוצר רוח כי התורה מרחבת לבו של אדם. Since this was before מתן תורה, their minds were narrow. The Torah opens or broadens a person’s mind.
How does Torah give someone הרחבת הדעת? Why is it that בני תורה would have a greater ability to imagine possibilities that are not yet realized or considered? The idea of the אור החיים is that when one’s opinions are fully formulated and worked out to the point of clarity, one then has the ability to understand other possibilities and the opinions of others. With the clarity and surety that comes from knowledge of the Torah, one can indeed now hear what others have to say, take it in, and integrate that information.
This is the kind of clarity of vision a leader needs. With this strength, he is not buffeted by the whimsy of every individual, and he can consider these other perspectives and opinions. In fact, these other opinions can be meaningful to him, and he can consider and integrate them into his leadership with compassion and understanding.
Respond to the שואל, not the שאלה
I heard a fundamental idea from my grandfather many times: One never answers a שאלה, one answers a שואל. When giving advice or providing guidance, a leader doesn’t respond to the question; he responds to the questioner.
I found a fascinating journal of his. He wrote in the beginning the following: משום שמדינה זו זרה ושאלותיהם זרות… Since this is a different kind of country, with unique questions, people need immediate answers. They say, “Tell me the answer now, I can’t wait.” So, there are times when I answer the question right away. Then he continued: אמרתי לעצמי… I told myself that I would write these questions down, and when I find the time, I’ll look into them again. A number of interesting questions followed. What my grandfather understood, however, was that the questions were different. There were differences: the people asking came from various avenues and walks of life. So, the questions they asked raised so many other questions and different angles of questions. My grandfather also avoided writing any תשובה להלכה. He felt you couldn’t make a כלל, a generalization that should apply to any and everyone.
I recall when I personally asked him a שאלה before I went to Australia to join a kollel. I asked him just one question, and he gave me 20 different angles, perspectives, things I never thought about, and personal things about myself. I thought I was deliberating on this one question, but he had so many angles of understanding what about this question was so specific to me, and what I should or shouldn’t be doing. Consistently, he would answer a שואל, not a שאלה.
This is what we mean with כל אחד ואחד לפי דעתו and רוחו של כל אחד ואחד. A leader must understand the questioner to understand the question. Then he can deal with it. Then he can tolerate. Then he can carry. Real leadership is to indeed get into the understanding of the שואל. A leader has his opinions formulated and thought out. As such, he is able to stand up and say what he thinks the right path forward should be, not being challenged by the opinions of others. He can be open and hear where they’re coming from. With empathy, he can ask, “What’s your perspective?” That’s leadership.
A school principal needs to be such a leader. A principal must understand that teachers are not simply professional teachers, but individuals with unique preferences, perspectives, and positions. This changes the way they deal with them. By viewing them as individuals, he recognizes the challenge and benefit of getting them to mesh as a team and work together as a group. It’s a totally different approach. הקב”ה should help us develop this חוש of leadership: to have אוזן קשבת a listening ear, to understand others, to have a clear vision, and to answer the שואל, not the שאלה. Then, true leadership emerges.
Rabbi Sholom Kamenetsky is a Rosh Yeshiva at the Talmudical Yeshiva of Philadelphia.