The Blessings and Challenges of Diversity in a Jewish Day School

by Alanna Pepper, LMSW, and Rabbi Dr. Avichai Pepper

As adults, we often view diversity through the lens of challenge, like something to be navigated and explained, and as such, it brings up deep concerns. We’re naturally nervous when our children interact with those of different backgrounds, including followers of other religions, those with differing hashkafos, or even just people raised with a different value system. While all these differences can create questions for children, they can also lend a place for unity, respect, and meaningful conversations.  When we add a perspective of a focus on similarities, we can create meaningful and respectful connections. From this perspective, diversity is as much of a blessing as it is a challenge.

Several years ago, while running a Jewish Orthodox overnight summer camp in Mississippi, we decided to bring our campers to play basketball against the only other Jewish camp in the state, a Reform Jewish camp. As directors, we wrestled with how to present the differences between our camps, hashkafa, and general hanhaga. Should we prepare our campers for theological contrasts? Should we address halachic variances? Which differences are critical to discuss, and which would be seen as derogatory?

Once we arrived at the URJ camp, it quickly became clear to us that kids playing basketball are just kids playing basketball. And Jewish kids playing basketball are even better! Instead of focusing on what set us apart, we leaned into our shared identity as Jews at sleep-away camp in Mississippi. We played the game, celebrated our Judaism, and highlighted the privilege of being Jewish campers in the Deep South of the United States. The experience brought an unexpected closeness and respect between our campers (the full story is here) and taught us that unity does not require uniformity.

The Beauty of Diversity

When creating man, the Torah tells us that Hashem created Adam in His image (Bereshis 1:27). The creation in G-d’s image is not limited to Jews as opposed to non-Jews or Ashkenazim to the exclusion of Sefardim, nor to any particular race. Hashem created all humans to be in His image and encompass His care, compassion, and love for others. Children who are thoughtfully exposed to people from different backgrounds can develop middos that reflect the creation of Hakadosh Baruch Hu, including patience and respect. Encountering others from varying hashkafos, cultural traditions, and even nationalities can broaden students’ perspectives and help them appreciate the richness of Klal Yisrael and beyond. 

Diversity in a Jewish day school setting also teaches students that there is more than one way to live a true Torah life. The choshen worn by the kohain gadol was made up of different stones. Each stone, with its own unique color and style, represented a different shevet’s strength and personality. Likewise, the divinity of Klal Yisrael can be seen and celebrated through gaining an awareness of the customs of Sephardic, Ashkenazi, Chassidic, Yeshivish, or Modern Orthodox families and students. This awareness brings a sense of the depth and beauty of the Jewish people, as a united and whole nation that transcends each individual’s practices and personality. Exposure to differences in practice, when presented in a respectful manner, can instill a love for the broader Jewish community rather than a fear of the unfamiliar.  

The Challenges of Diversity

Despite its beauty, diversity in a Jewish day school and Jewish communities at large can also present real and tangible challenges. Students may encounter ideas, behaviors, or religious attitudes that differ from those taught and valued at home. These might take form in the allowances of technology, books that are read, content and style of conversation, levels of kashrus, exposure to the larger world and its cultures, and more. When these differences are not addressed openly and properly, they can create confusion and doubt. For example, a child raised in a strictly halacha-observant home may struggle to understand why a friend’s family approaches halacha differently. Without a safe space to process these differences, students might arrive at wrong conclusions, either rejecting their own upbringing or looking down on those who practice differently.

Furthermore, diversity in staff backgrounds can be a double-edged sword. Teachers and administrators shape the school environment, and their personal religious and political perspectives inevitably influence their interactions with students, classroom practices, and more. When these perspectives align with the school’s hashkafa, they reinforce a sense of consistency and trust. However, when differences arise or classrooms go unchecked, whether in halachic approach, personal practice, or even worldview, students may find themselves grappling with conflicting messages. How do we embrace the blessings of diversity while mitigating its challenges? A balanced approach to diversity begins with the relationship. This relationship cannot be built on corrective interactions alone and must be preceded by a loving, constant, warm, and open relationship. Positivity in our everyday interactions with our children and our students is the most critical aspect of the balance of dealing with diversity and other challenging topics and conversations.  This gives the ability and platform for honesty and openness, giving our children the space to share what they are thinking and feeling, even at a young age.  

Parents

1. Create an Open and Nonjudgmental Space: Encourage children to ask questions about differences they notice in school. This space of open conversations begins when children are young, with the development of a relationship that does not address the issues in a reactionary way. Frame conversations in a way that highlights both the beauty and complexity of Klal Yisrael. Listen and guide children through the eyes of love and care as conversations of diversity arise. There are topics, perspectives, and ideas that our children absorb that are wrong and could be misleading or even dangerous and detrimental. Maintaining an open and nonjudgmental dialogue can leave an avenue to carefully counterbalance with loving conversation. Having an open relationship with them in this regard will encourage them to come talk to you as opposed to finding their answers elsewhere.
2. Don’t Hide, Guide: Rather than shielding children from diverse perspectives, help them navigate those perspectives with curiosity and confidence. Build up the beauty of your family’s hashkafa without putting down others, just as you would hope they would do for you.
3. Be Involved: Knowing your child’s friends and understanding their school and family environment allows you to guide their experiences in a positive and healthy way. Stay involved in your children’s lives and continue to foster a positive and meaningful relationship with them (and their schools).

Schools and Teachers

1. Teach with Sensitivity and Alignment: Educators should be mindful to teach within the expectations of the school’s hashkafa and avoid presenting personal opinions as absolutes that leave no space for families to supportively correct or realign what has been discussed in class with their own hashkafa, halacha, or minhagim. It is helpful to guide students to their family rav so that when questions arise, the family can ask and come back to school and share. Such discussions open a space of safety, respect, and trust between schools and families.
2. Foster Unity Without Erasing Differences: Schools should create an environment where students feel comfortable embracing their backgrounds while respecting others.
3. Encourage Positive Peer Interactions: Opportunities for cooperative learning and shared experiences help students see beyond differences and form meaningful and mutually respectful friendships.

Like the twelve shevatim, our community is made up of diverse and often equally valuable parts. If we approach diversity with intentionality, respect, and a focus on shared values, we can raise a generation of students who are both proud of their personal traditions and deeply connected to the broader Jewish people. Teaching the value of seeing other perspectives while cautiously maintaining the lines that are important to us is critical. By shifting the conversation from “challenge” to “opportunity”, we can give our children and students the greatest gift of a foundation of love, respect, growth, individuality, acceptance, and belonging.

Alanna Pepper, LMSW, is a dedicated therapist at Shalom Tikvah, a nonprofit clinic committed to supporting the Jewish communities of Maryland. Alanna holds a master’s degree in counseling from Liberty University and a master’s in social work from Yeshiva University’s Wurzweiler School of Social Work. She is also a volunteer at Chai Lifeline Crisis Services Mid-Atlantic. Alanna can be reached directly at alanna@shalomtikvah.org.

Rabbi Dr. Avichai Pepper is the Director of Educational Support Services at the Yeshiva of Greater Washington, teaches Judaic Studies at Berman Hebrew Academy, serves as a teacher coach and presenter through Lomdei and Kadima, and is an adjunct professor at Woodmont College’s School of Education and School of Behavioral Science. A graduate of the New England Rabbinical College in Providence, RI, he holds a doctorate in educational leadership from Liberty University, a master’s degree in educational leadership from Bellevue University, and a master’s degree in counseling from Liberty University. He is also a volunteer at Chai Lifeline Crisis Services Mid-Atlantic and International. Avichai can be reached at apepper@yeshiva.edu.

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